The edge of dissociation…

The edge
The edge of dissociation

 

 

 

 
I fell, I fell hard. I got hurt and I had pain. I fell there where I thought to find the way even without the sight of my eyes. I fell with my eyes wide open. My guards down and my heart-broken. I wished that life could stop that moment, take a u turn and warn me but it did not. It led me to fall. It made me realize that love is nothing more than a playful way of word use. That love is an illusion we want to believe in with a desperate loneliness. We wish to seek healing in that which broke us. We wish to find peace within the chaos it left us in. The one supposed to offer us security takes away the ground beneath our feet. You feel dissociated with life. When people tell you that your relationship with pain is over understand that pain always is a part of life. It will cut you like a knife, burn you like hellfire and make you feel broken in every essence of the word.

It’s just a three word sentence that will change your perception on people and their intentions. While you were happily alone they make way in to your life with lies. The sun is their gift, your smile their hard work, their life your property. Their eyes request your presence , their breathing seems to stop by you leaving. It seems a fairytale, to good to be true, a prayer made for you by god. It seems like heaven made his way down to earth and you are the guest of honor. But like every lie also this will not last forever and before you know it your world crushes in ruins. That place you once knew as peace starts feeling like a trap. Those arms which were once your guardians will start to choke the life out of you. Those eyes that once gave you the feeling of hope will leave you with just doubt. Those lips who sealed every kiss with a promise will only utter the words of betrayal. So whenever you face the perfect face of love , remember that even angels can fall in to a sin, and by doing so they are called the devil.

By S.A

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